CONFIDENCE: FAKE IT 'TIL YOU MAKE IT!

Confidence is key to not being bullied. It's a vicous circle though, because if you're shy when you are young (like me), it's easier for you to be bullied. Then when you are bullied, it will severely knock your confidence, thus leaving it easier to be bullied again. This is harsh but true.

When I started a new school at the age of 12, I was still shy, but I decided I needed to pretend to be confident in myself. Not over confident though. I pushed boundaries and tried to make new friends. I was still super shy at heart though. But, as I grew older I became less conscious of what other people though of me. My personality developed, and by the age of 15, I started to actually feel confident. I didn't have to pretend I was as much. Obviously, not many people are ever 100% confident. I still get shy or nervous sometimes.

It works though. FAKE IT 'TIL YOU MAKE IT. The more you pretend you are confident, the more you actually become confident. So just SMILE and exude your inner confidence! And make eye contact! :) 'The eyes are the windows to the soul.'

You gotta believe in yourself. If you don't believe in yourself, who will? Look in the mirror. You are beautiful. No one can judge you for who you are, because everybody is different. Question: How boring would the world be if everyone was the same? Answer: Extremely.

''Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage and confidence in the doing.'' -Theodore Roosevelt.

''With confidence, you can reach truely reach amazing heights; without confidence, even the simplest accomplishments are beyond out grasp.''- Jim Loehr.

If you are being bullied, it is so important that you don't let the bully know you are upset. Ignore them and walk away. Please try not to cry. I always cry though- over stupid things, so this is really hard for me!

Okay this bit sounds a bit weird, but try and think of someone who is really confident and try to copy them. For me, I always think of Bree on Desperate Housewives! They always talk about how great she is at showing no emotion in public. So I just think of her, she doesn't cry when she is upset or get angry. Be Bree! I remember one time, she told Susan that when she felt tears coming on, to take a deep breath, and imagine in your mind putting the emotion into a box and storing it in a mental cupboard until later. Then when you are alone, you can open that box, and deal with the emotion. Obviously, I do show emotion usually, but if somebody is being mean or tormenting me, I do this. Fake your confidence. Pretend whatever they are saying to you isn't happening.

I hope something hear helps you! :)

Remember: Fake confidence, but don't change who you are.

Talk soon,
Ruth.

XO